If you could make three changes, what would they be?

What are the first things that come to mind when I ask the question “If you could change three things in your life, what would they be?”

Mine are: meditate daily, run two times a week (in addition to what I’m already doing), declutter.

Next question is: “Why aren’t you doing these three things already?

The number one answer has to be because these things (whatever they are for you) aren’t really a priority in your life.  Whatever you are currently doing with that time you’re placing more value on than actually making these changes, whether consciously or unconsciously.  In most cases we’d answer the above question by saying “I don’t have the time”.  What we really mean is “I have other things I view as more important”.

The older I get the more I realize that I need to start controlling the minutes of my life, policing them with more care.  I’m not someone who really beats myself up over spending time watching TV or using Facebook at all, I really enjoy both of those activities a lot.  There’s something to be said for just kicking back and relaxing online or by watching TV, movies, gaming, whatever it is for you.  But the idea that I don’t have time to meditate daily when I spend two hours online and/or watching TV, well… I did have the time.  I just didn’t use it.

I spoke a while back about trying to write ten minutes a day, which I’ve so far been sporadic on at best.  I’ve been tracking that, as well as other daily goals (meditate daily, listen to one ‘feel good’ song, get eight hours of sleep, etc) at www.tdp.me , which I really enjoy.  At least it has me think once or twice a day about maybe doing the things I’ve listed as important to me.

Which leads me to today… I’ve got my writing in for today.  I plan on meditating today.  How would my life change if I really looked at how I spend my time and listened to my own inner voice regarding what’s really important, then made changes accordingly?  Too often we go on autopilot and let the only moments we have, which is now, get eaten by activities that don’t serve us.  I do think we need time for mindless entertainment – internet and TV are two of my biggies – but, how much time?  What if we just took an hour a day to focus on something else we truly wished we had the time for?  Or thirty minutes?  It could transform our lives in ways we’d never know… unless we actually did them.

So, I’ll ask you again: “Why aren’t you doing these things already?”

Ten Minutes a Day

Last year I was able to do some amazing things.  I went to a Wayne Dyer seminar in Maui, complete with a whale watching tour.  At that seminar he mentioned a writer’s workshop to be held later in the year in Denver that I also attended.  I started, for a brief while, to see and feel myself as a writer.  I had 16 chapter “preview” copies of my book made up.  I started to believe I could get it done, and I felt that my writing was improving.

The Denver workshop was in April.  The last time I wrote anything was September 15^th… over six months ago.  Six months without writing anything.  I have many excuses, #1 being the NFL Football season.  It takes time to run four fantasy football teams, you know!  But it runs deeper than that.  My confidence level is pretty low when it comes to writing, which leads to procrastination.  Any time you do anything artistic and share it with the public you open yourself up to scrutiny and become vulnerable.  Making music, painting, taking photos, writing… once you throw it out there it opens you up for critique.  And I can be my own worst critic.  Sometimes doing nothing just seems easier and a body at rest tends to stay there.

I recently read an article called “The Seinfeld Strategy” by James Clear.  Mainly it caught my eye because of the Seinfeld reference, but I loved the advice held within.  Write every day, don’t be attached to the results.  Make an X on your calendar every day you write and don’t break the chain.

Right after reading that article, I read the book “I was blind but now I see” by James Altucher.  In it, he talks about setting small daily goals in four categories: emotional, mental, physical & spiritual.  He mentions the website www.TDP.me to track it daily, very similar to “The Seinfeld Strategy”.

“Writing a book” can seem like an insurmountable task.  “Write ten minutes a day” doesn’t seem that hard.  The trick is to make your goals doable.  “Work out two hours every day” might scare you into inaction & burnout, whereas “do twenty pushups a day” wouldn’t.  And once you get started you’ll often do more.  Set tasks that you feel you can realistically accomplish.

So I’m starting a new chain today – the “write ten minutes a day” chain.  I’m planning on posting whatever I write every day as well, good or bad.  The more I write, the better I’ll get.  I learned music and finance by studying, practicing, meeting with others and keeping with it over a period of years because I felt called to do it.  Now I feel pretty confident in both those areas, but there were certainly moments of self doubt at first.  The same thing will happen here.  Eventually, writing will become a habit. Unless the writing is pertinent on this blog I will be posting the daily ten minutes here: www.TheDailyTen.net

I welcome your thoughts…

Are you happy?

It’s a fairly simple question to ask, “Are you happy?”  So, when my wife asked it of me I snarled, “Yeah, I’m happy”… but inside I started to really wonder, as she replied, “You don’t seem happy”

Why wouldn’t I be happy?  I have a job I love, my health, a great home, a supportive family.  Shouldn’t I exude happiness on a daily basis?

I also have meetings and deadlines and bills and responsibilities and I’m internally wired to work all the time.  My internal thoughts and dialogue constantly push me to be better, to do more, and to be number one.

But why?  How did this happen?  What’s REALLY important?

The older I get the more I realize the importance of conscious contact with God.  It really needs to become the focus of my life.  Shouldn’t it be the focus of all our lives?  I’ve written about this before – if conscious contact with God is the most important thing in our lives, why isn’t it the most important thing in our lives?

We’re so caught up in the stream of thoughts that can’t be turned off – the mind is always thinking, always talking, and has no mute button.  Most people believe the thoughts that run through our minds are who we are, what determines us as people.  What we are, though – is the soul behind the thoughts watching everything unfold like watching a movie.  When we start to realize that we are the watcher and not the thoughts we’re getting closer to enlightenment.  Two recent books that I have read go into this – “The Power of Now” by Eckhart Tolle and “The Untethered Soul” by Michael A. Singer.  Both are highly recommended.

To get in touch with “the watcher” we need to quiet our minds.  Yoga and meditation are two great ways to do this.  “The watcher” is that part of us connected to God.  It’s love in its purest sense.  When in contact with this part of your soul, people won’t ask if you’re happy, you will radiate love and happiness.  It does take an effort to get in touch with this part of yourself.

The Dalai Lama said “If every 8 year old in the world is taught meditation, we will eliminate violence from the world within one generation.” Yet the vast majority of people never meditate at all.  The most important thing we can do to create loving, lasting relationships is highly overlooked.

The more contact we have with God, with “the watcher”, the calmer life becomes.  We can start to step back from obsessive/compulsive thoughts and watch ourselves like we’d watch a movie.  But “the watcher” can control the outcome, can make us become unattached from always “being right” or wanting an outcome the mind believes we need.  The more we define our lives from that place within us all that is timeless and eternal, the happier we all will be.

God might have a plan for you that would blow you away.  You’ll never know without seeking Him.

Step back, find the part of you that watches the thoughts.  Get in touch with God, with love, every chance you can.  Look for ways to schedule this into your life.  It’s the most important, most overlooked thing in the world.  God won’t come screaming to you with a deadline to meet, you need to seek Him.  Hopefully instead of asking “Are you happy”, the people we know and love will start asking us “Why are you so happy all the time?” when we do.

Winning the game of life

I like to win.  I mean, I *really* like to win, I’m extremely competitive.  If I’m playing with my grandkids, I’ll let them win once in a while, but I won’t like it.  A part of me will still be saying “he’s six years old, take that kid DOWN!”

Sports and games are fairly easy to determine who the winner is.  The person or team with the most points, the most money, maybe the least points (golf) or the shortest time period (races) is the winner.  Everyone else loses.

The other day, I got to thinking – how do you win the game of life?  When you get to the end, what would be considered a “victory”?  Life isn’t a game with only one winner, we all have the chance to leave a lasting legacy if we so desire to.  Winning the game of life will be different for everyone, but thinking about what you personally would consider a “win” might open your eyes a bit.  It certainly did for me.

The question I asked myself when trying to determine my criteria for winning the game of life was “What are the most important things to do while on earth to view my life as a success?”… My list:

• CONSCIOUS CONTACT WITH GOD: For me, everything starts here.  Seeking God’s wisdom and guidance is the number one most important thing in life as everything else flows from this.  Without consciously seeking God’s guidance on a regular basis, decision making can be very unclear as it isn’t always so easy to tell which voice in your head is that of God and which is that of the ego.

So, if conscious contact with God is the number one most important thing in life, it certainly must be where I devote most of my time and effort, right?... Not even close.  Right out of the gate, this is a huge eye opener for me.

The ego is very good at creating a lifestyle that edges God out.  Edge God Out = EGO.  I truly believe that if we could open our minds to what God’s will is for us we would find ourselves blessed at levels beyond our comprehension.  And therein lies the problem – how can we receive anything that is beyond our comprehension?

Receiving God’s gifts takes faith, faith at a level so high that it will sustain you through the fear of making the necessary changes to allow you to live the life God willed for you.  Faith this strong needs to be worked on, cultivated and sought after.  It comes from having a strong relationship with God.

To me, the most important thing in life is conscious contact with God.  If I get to life’s finish line and look back and see that I built a strong relationship with God, really got in touch with His will for me and followed that path to the best of my ability… I’ll consider that a win.

• IMPACT AS MANY PEOPLE AS POSSIBLE IN A POSITIVE WAY: I love the movie “It’s a Wonderful Life”.  One of my favorite parts from that movie is when they show Jimmy Stewart’s character what would have happened had he never been born, how many lives he impacted in a positive way.

People generally fall into one of two categories, either “What can I get?” or “How can I serve?”.  The people who have the greatest success in life focus on “How can I serve?”

The “What can I get?” mindset will never understand the “How can I serve?” mindset except in a way that they will try to take advantage of for their own personal gains.  If you’re focusing on how you can get something for nothing and/or scam your way through life, then people with the “How can I serve?” mindset are perfect targets, right?  They want to help.

Often there are lessons to be learned on both sides when the two interact.  The “What can I get?” mindset needs to learn that by switching to a “How can I serve?” mindset everything they seek would come to them much easier.  The “How can I serve?” mindset often has to learn that when dealing with a “What can I get?” mindset often the best help is no help at all.  When you give somebody something they didn’t work for they won’t really appreciate it.

I want to help anyone I can anyway I can, always.  Whatever situations are put into my life, I seek God’s will and look for how I can serve and/or what the lesson is for me.  Looking back on my life and seeing that I did the best I could to help everyone I could, in any way possible, would be considered a win for me.

• LOVE, JOY AND PEACE: I don’t want to look back at my life and see that my days were spent full of anxiety, worry and depression.  Hatred, fear and anger held such a strong hold over me for so long that I continually struggle to not let them gain a foothold in my life again.  I’m calling my book “FEED YOUR ANGEL” because I believe the best way to address this is to focus on what is going right in your life, to look at what is possible and to see that with God by your side there are no limits to your potential.

As creatures of routine, we dig ruts in our lives.  Every day we travel through a rut it gets deeper and deeper.  Most ruts are ego based and full of anxiety, worry and despair.  The deeper the rut, the more fear involved to climb out and head a different direction.  Humans have ruts running through many areas of our lives – relationships, work, money, and mindset.  I dug a mindset rut for myself that I continue to dig out of every day.  Some days the rut still wins.

Living from the place within you that knows only love, joy and peace isn’t necessarily as easy as it sounds.  Jobs and family have demands, demands can cause stress, and stress feeds on anxiety, worry and fear.  If I don’t spend a lot of time focusing on what is good and right with my life, I will inevitably start to slide.  The ego is a powerful force that will seep in wherever it sees weakness, doubts, fears, worries and anxieties.

Mindset is a daily struggle for me.  I know that if I really want to impact the lives of others in a positive way, my mindset has to be focused on what is good and right.  Love is the emotion that impacts others.  Love, excitement, passion – these are the qualities I wish to exude.

I would be very satisfied if I thought, at the end of my life, that people saw me as a loving, energetic person who lived passionately from a position of love, joy and peace.

So, that’s my list.  I will win the game of life by increasing my conscious contact with God, following His will for me to the best of my ability, helping as many people along the way that I can by living my life focusing on love, joy and peace.

It is my hope that my list will help you find yours and that we all get to the end of the game of life as winners.

Fear and Doubt

Why are we so scared to follow our dreams and so willing to follow the herd into a workforce destined to suck the passion from our hearts?

Dreams are scary. They usually involve putting yourself out there in some capacity and being very vulnerable on a personal or financial level, and often both.

The herd will try dragging you down at first, you might encounter a LOT of negative feedback reinforcing the idea that following your dreams is foolish.

So, where did the dream come from? Aren't dreams and passions God’s way of directing us to where our joy is? Would God put inspiration in our hearts looking for us to ignore it so that we can work a job we hate to pay bills for things we could live without?

Maybe, just MAYBE - if we could suspend our fear, if we could overlook our doubts and just start to get in touch with that part of the soul where passion and inspiration resides, the Universe would conspire to help us. Everything would fall into place.

Why so much fear? Why do we doubt ourselves? Where does fear and doubt come from?

There is light and there is darkness. There are angels and there are demons. Fear and doubt stop more dreams and create more unhappiness than any other emotions I can think of. I see them as dark and demonic. Self talk controlled from such a place will always pull you down.

My hope is that you’re reading this and can’t relate to any of it so far because you followed your passions and dreams your entire life and are living unencumbered by fear and doubt. Are you? If not, why? Aren’t you in control of your own choices? 

Get in touch with your passions. Find what moves your heart, where inspiration lies deep within your soul. It might be buried so deep that you’ll have to do extensive digging to find it. But it’s there. It’s there for all of us. And it’s there for a reason. Dig the passion from your soul and start moving toward the light. The only thing stopping you is your own belief that you can’t.

Don't fight where you're led

Sometimes in life we are led in a direction that takes on a life of it’s own before we even have a clue what’s happening.  Years later we look back and see how everything unfolded and if just one piece of the puzzle was one iota different then everything would have changed.  But it didn’t.  It unfolded the way it did for a reason.  We either accepted life’s pull and went along with the feeling of our heart, or we fought it every step of the way.  Fighting your dreams leads to “if onlys” and “what ifs”… that’s how you’ll be able to tell if you followed the path God laid out for you.  Don’t fight your dharma. 

Feed your angel…  FEED YOUR ANGEL!

Life gives us choices.  If we follow what our heart yearns for, if we can get in touch with our passions and let our souls be the guide - without letting the ego’s incessant chatter about all the reasons we can’t do anything hold us back - and we grab hold of those dreams and advance in that direction… that’s when miracles happen.  That’s where passion resides in the soul of every human.  That’s where the future you dream of will become your reality.

There’s a reason this book isn’t called “Fight Your Demon”.  When we fight something we’ve already lost.  When given the choice of reacting with fear or acting with love, choose love.  Stand up for what is right for yourself, for your family, for the world.  There’s no fighting in that.  There’s no fear.  There’s no anger.  If love is all we’re seeking, why not spend more time advancing in the direction of love?

You were given passion at birth.  Do you remember?  What are you passionate about?  Do you know?  Get in touch with your passions.  Begin to follow your heart.  Don’t deny this, don’t fight what the Universe has given you as your “life pull”.

There is something burning in your heart.  There is a passion longing for release.  You have an ego that will fight you on this and tell you why you can’t get in touch with this loving, unconditional spirit that lives inside us all.

Don’t fight where you’re led!

If you knew, really KNEW, that God put you on earth for a specific reason and that you’re only mission in life was to get in touch with your passions and follow your heart to achieve everything you ever desired, would you follow your heart?  Or would you fight it every step of the way and deny yourself?

Life pulls us in the direction of our dreams.  Learn to be led by your passions.  Get out of your way.  Dreams become realities through belief.  Find your dreams, get back in touch with your passions – that driving force within you that creates burning desire.  Suspend your disbelief in what is possible and follow your heart.  Miracles are made when dreams meet belief.

What took me so long?

I’m writing today as the “special preview edition” of FEED YOUR ANGEL will be shipped to me in three days.  I am also scheduled to go to Denver next weekend for a writer’s seminar.  This past month I’m actually beginning to SEE it, to FEEL like a writer.  I’ve been working on the cover and interior design for the preview edition and on Tuesday I’ll hold them in my hands.  NOT the full book, but sixteen chapters, fifty-four pages and a dream of mine as long as I can remember.  What a great, great feeling that will be.

As I think about that moment I can’t help but wonder… what took me so long?  If I’ve wanted to write since I was in elementary school, why haven’t I been writing all along?  What is it that took fifty three years to get here?  Probably a combination of several things:

• I HAD OTHER PRIORITIES – As I grew up, I also became interested in music.  By the time I was a teenager, I could see myself as a “rock star”, and visualizing myself as an author took a back seat.

• CONFIDENCE – Because I wasn’t writing very much my confidence level to be able to do an entire book wasn’t all that great.  It seemed like a daunting, time consuming task.

• DESIRE – I didn’t have a particular idea that resonated within me and made me WANT to pick up a notepad and start writing.  Once I came up with the FEED YOUR ANGEL idea and started writing an amazing series of events began to take place that led me to this time and place where dreams are becoming reality.

I could probably list many other reasons, but these are the three biggies that come to mind first.

Today, I woke up at 4:30am… on a Saturday.  One of the few days where I could have slept in.  But my mind was racing with all the things I wanted to get done for the book and it’s associated websites.  Isn’t this the way life was meant to be?  So excited for the day because it’s filled doing what you love?

I’m starting to SEE and FEEL like an author.  I’m excited to start looking for speaking engagements when I get back from Denver.  Instead of wondering why it took me so long to actually write a book, I know that this publication wasn’t ready to be presented until now, and I’m just the channel it chose.  The book is writing itself, I needed the time to prepare to receive it.  I needed to meet people who thought it was a good idea.  I needed to meet people who knew I could do this before I knew it myself.

When the book is ready, the author appears.

The road to Detroit

“Detroit”… “Motown”… “Motor City”… all the same town.  Many ways to get there.  Several highways head into the city.  So, if you took highway 75 to Detroit and made it into town, would you then decide that’s the only way to get there?  Would you stand on street corners, go door to door and proclaim to everyone “I have FOUND Detroit!  You must take highway 75 to get there!”… The first person to mention they took highway 53 to Detroit MUST be confused, right?  You KNOW from personal experience highway 75 gets you to Detroit!  There are signs all over highway 75 where it is WRITTEN – Detroit 5 miles… Detroit with arrows pointing the way for you… Highway 75 is the way to get to Detroit, any rational person can see that.

What if someone not only doesn’t take highway 75, but also decides they’d rather call Detroit “Motown” – or “Motor City”?... “Yep”, they’d say – “We took highway 96 to Motown yesterday”… well, that’s just wrong.  Wrong name, wrong highway – they obviously know nothing about Detroit.

Fact is, there are many ways to get to Detroit.  No one way is any better than any other.  One road might be more convenient than another depending on where you live, but – many roads lead to Detroit.  And no matter what you call it – it’s still Detroit.

Substitute “GOD” for Detroit.  So many names, so many ways to find God.  Why do people think if they’ve found God one way it’s the only way to get there?  Why does the name matter?  Allah?  Jesus?  Mohammed?... What road got you there?  Christianity?  Taoism?  Buddhism?...

No matter what you call it, it’s still God.  And there are many ways to get there.

Ram Dass, when he was younger, took LSD as a spiritual quest.  He gave some to his guru – more than any one man should have been able to handle.  It had no effect on the guru, leading Ram Dass to surmise “When you already live in Detroit, you don’t need to take a bus to get there”.

It is my goal to some day “live in Detroit”.  I’m willing to consider any and all paths that head in that direction.

My own worst critic

I’m very seldom happy or satisfied with where I’m at in life.  It seems like no matter what I do I feel I could have done better, given more, gone an extra step or two… there are times when I allow myself to feel grateful for all I have, I certainly am grateful for many, many things… but my days are often caught up pushing, striving and working to achieve MORE.  I am also EXTREMELY critical of myself as well.  Anything perceived as a failure, or not up to the standards I’ve set for myself can be emotionally devastating to me.

I have no idea where this personality trait comes from, maybe one or both parents, I’m not really sure.  I do know it has benefits and drawbacks for me, as is often the case with many things in life.  As a young musician, I wanted to play everything perfectly and effortlessly, so it drove me to practice 2+ hours/day for years until I became a good enough player to be satisfied with my abilities.  I take that same drive into anything I do – I want to not just learn something, I want to be one of the BEST at anything I do… which, of course, is not always possible… especially at first.  It’s this drive that has helped me become a fairly accomplished musician and salesperson, although the same part that drives me also looks back at what I’ve done and usually thinks “I could have done better”…

The drawbacks of this “I should be instantaneously great at everything I do” attitude include having to go through the emotions of doing things at first that aren’t so perfect – whether it was playing that first show, making that first sales call, writing the first chapter, giving the first speech… and dealing with the outpouring of negative emotions that follow.  The interior dialogue that says “That was awful, what were you thinking?  You can’t do this!”… It can kill things before you even get started.

I gave a speech in 2012 that didn’t go very well at all.  Now, I also gave many talks in 2012 that were very good.  The one that sticks with me is the “failure”.  I gave no talks after that, even thinking about it now fills me with negative emotions.  When prepared, I can do a pretty good presentation.  I think I went into that particular speech just thinking my natural ability would carry me – sometimes it will.  That day it didn’t.  I stopped really looking to give talks after that.  It also has affected my writing… I don’t have much confidence in my writing.  Because of that I am very critical of anything I post.

I’m writing a book called FEED YOUR ANGEL not because I believe I have it all figured out – but because I DON’T.  I need to remind myself every day that my thoughts will create my reality, to focus on what’s going right, to look at the bright side…

There is almost always a battle raging within me.  As I write this I’m thinking “Very few people will ever read this, nobody cares what you think, you’re not a very good writer, this is a stupid idea”… At the same time I’m thinking “This is a great idea, if you continue writing and speaking there’s no limit to the amount of people who’s lives you can positively impact, keep going, you’ll get better, you can do it”…

It’s a battle similar to this that keeps most of us from ever trying anything new – starting a business, relocating, writing a book, whatever it is… it’s always easier to stick with where you’re at and what you know than to make any changes or try something new.  Change can be scary.  Failure, even if it’s only “perceived” failure, is very hard to overcome.  The path to self confidence runs through the road of failure, though.  Only the things you are truly passionate about will give you the drive to succeed.

Writing a book has been a goal of mine since I was a little kid.  I intend to succeed.  In the process I hope that some of what I write resonates with someone else in a positive way.

The blink of an eye

Life is short and guaranteed to no one.  My father lived to be 71… at the time of this writing, that would be 18 more years for me.  Mom lived until she was 97, which would be 44 years.  Reality will probably fall somewhere in between – maybe 35 years?... 35 years will BLOW by.  How will I use that time?  What is REALLY important?  Am I happy with where my life is at today?  Are my own beliefs about what is truly possible limiting my future?  What if it all ended today, have I lived a meaningful life?...

I spend a lot of time thinking about these things, maybe we all do.  The older I get, the more I realize the power of BELIEF.  For years I’ve bought into the idea that “you become what you think about”.  Based on that, I’ve tried to see myself as a wealthy, happy, healthy individual and make that my mindset.  What I’ve found, though, is that if you tell yourself “I will be a millionaire by the time I’m 50” but internally every time you say or think that thought your subconscious mind says “no, you won’t” you will have a tough time achieving that goal.  The saying is “whatever you can conceive and BELIEVE you can achieve”.  BELIEF is really the key here.

As a society, I think we limit ourselves by our patterns of thought.  We fall into routines that may or may not serve our best interests.  The routines become ingrained and when thoughts pop up like “I should learn how to play the piano” they are quickly shot down by all the reasons that’s a stupid idea, leaving us to live day to day lives that often are duplicates of the day before… our own versions of the movie “Groundhog Day”.  On our tombstones, we could have: “Here lies Schmitty, he lived one day very well many times over”.  To truly achieve anything in life we need to stretch our thoughts and what we believe is possible for ourselves.  We need to take risks.

In the blink of an eye, our lives will be over.  What does your heart tell you?  Are you happy?  Do you spend your days doing what you love to do with the people you love to be with?  Are there yearnings inside you that you’ve long ago decided not to pursue but leave you wondering “what if”?...

“what if” I volunteered my time to help others less fortunate?...

“what if” I started my own business?...

“what if” I started to paint, to write music, to dance, to meditate, to exercise, etc, etc, etc...”

Pull the “what ifs” from your subconscious mind.  Find one that moves your heart.  Change your thoughts about what is possible.  Learn to BELIEVE you can do anything.  Take a risk.  DO IT NOW!  Tomorrow is guaranteed to no one.  The present moment is all we have, and our present moments are limited.  Make every moment count.  BELIEVE.

What are you?

Every night and every morning I say these words silently to myself:

I am rich

I am prosperous

I am abundant

I am healthy

I am happy

I am love

Every night these are the words I fall asleep to, these are the thoughts I give my subconscious mind to work on while I sleep.

Every morning, these are the words I use to start my day with the right attitude.

I’m writing a book called “Feed Your Angel” because for years I never saw myself this way.  I saw myself as poor, unhappy, unhealthy, angry and insecure.  I need to put supportive thoughts into my mind on a daily basis or the negative mind stream finds its way back to my subconscious.

There are many books that speak to the power of using the words “I AM”.  Be very careful what you program yourself to believe you are.  Using the phrase “I AM” followed by all the things you wish to see in your life every morning and evening gives you 730 opportunities per year to program your subconscious properly.  Your subconscious mind will begin to act on those beliefs.

When you use the term “I AM”, believe that whatever you say after it is true for you.  See that feeling or emotion as being who you are.  When you say “I am love”, see and feel what that means for your life.

Personally, I use “I am love” because I can have trouble controlling my anger at times.  When there’s a lot of stress and I feel pushed or things aren’t going exactly how I want them to I can get frustrated and angry.  You can tell what’s inside a person when they’re squeezed and too often anger is what I see in myself.  I want to replace that with love.  So, 730 times a year (at least) I tell myself “I am love”, “I am love”, “I am love”… and I see myself mentally responding differently to these situations.  You can’t put that much positive energy into your mind without seeing a positive impact on your life.

The List

I make lists, I have them everywhere.  There’s lists of things I need to do at home, lists for work, lists of players to look up for fantasy football, books I want to read, movies I want to see… they’re all over.  So it came as no surprise to me today when I opened a notebook and a list I made a long time ago fell out.  No date, nothing.  Just a list of ten things.  This is the list:

1. Be passionate
2. Smile often
3. Love everything
4. Exercise frequently
5. Have fun
6. Be honest
7. Seek God
8. Set goals
9. Read daily
10. Meditate often

I’m going to keep that list where I can see it every day from now on.  Advice to myself from myself that maybe came just at the right time on the right day for me now.  And hopefully it reaches you and your life in a similar fashion :)

Mixed Emotions

Ever feel like the rodeo of life has lassoed you several times and you’re stuck in the middle being pulled seventeen directions at the same time?  As you try heading in one direction, sixteen things are pulling you away from your goal?  It can be very emotionally draining.  Or, perhaps there’s no goal set at all and you’re just letting the people holding the ropes pull you wherever they want.  Well, it’s time you started pulling your own strings.

First, become clear on your goals.  I have no idea what the percentages are, but I believe the vast majority of people have no clear, concise version in their minds of what they want the future to look like… much LESS a plan of action for getting there.  With no plan, your life will be pulled wherever the external influences of your life wish to take you – you’re a ship without a rudder and your chances of landing in a port of your choice are greatly reduced.

Spend some time thinking about what your IDEAL life would look like.  Break it up into categories – work, physical, material, etc., and list everything you could ever want for yourself without limits.  Let the list sit for a while, add to it, subtract from it, and when you’re comfortable some things listed you’d really like to focus on create a list in order of importance.  Then systematically attack that list.

Now you have a list of goals and your #1 objective in place – how hard was that?  Not hard at all, just took a little time and effort placed on thinking about where we’d like to go.  We are preparing you mentally to see yourself succeeding.

Take goal #1 and start thinking about the steps it will take to get you there.  Think about the obstacles you will encounter as well, which are usually the things that have stopped you from acting on a goal in the past.  “I don’t have the money”, “I don’t have the knowledge”, “I don’t have the time”… if you let these thoughts defeat you then goal #1 wasn’t really anything you truly had any passion for.  What you’re looking for are goals that stir emotion in your heart, when you look at goal #1 your thoughts should be more along the lines of “I’m absolutely going to do this no matter what appears to stand in my way”.  Then make a list of all the things that have kept you from starting on this path to attain goal #1 in the past.

Once you have your list, sort the obstacles and steps to attainment of your goal into a clear list that you can logically start working on.  Once your list is done, look it over and begin to formulate a plan for achievement by starting with the first step on your list, develop a plan for success.  How do you eat an elephant?... one bite at a time.  The goal might seem insurmountable on its own, but taken step by step you start to see and believe it can be attained.

Back to the lasso analogy we started with – instead of struggling to get seventeen places at once, you need to pick the one thing that is most important to you and pull it in by focusing your attention on attainment of that particular goal and breaking it into smaller, achievable steps.  Once goal #1 has been achieved, we focus on #2, #3, etc., until you’ve pulled all your goals into your life and are free to live however you want to.

Funny thing about goals, though – once you attain a goal new ones will show up.  You never really become free from the emotional tug of war, but you can start to take more control by using the methods described above.  Success is a journey, not a destination.

Visualize Success

If it is true that we become what we think about, (and I believe it is), then what is your vision of the future?  Do you have one?  If your vision of the future looks pretty much like where you’re at now, guess what?  You’re living your future life already.  If you have no concept of what you want your future to look like, then by default it will look very similar to the life you’re currently leading.  There’s nothing inherently wrong with this unless your current situation is something you’d like to improve upon.

If you’re looking to make a change in any area of your life, it’s important that you are able to visualize your life as it will be after making the change.  Get in touch with the feelings and emotions associated with having made the change.  You have to internalize the end and believe it for yourself for any change to occur.  Then start acting from that belief… NOW!  When you see a future for yourself and truly believe this is how things will work out, then start acting on that faith, the change is inevitable.

Belief and faith are integral parts of this equation, though.  If you wish to make a change, but internally keep telling yourself it can’t be done it will be pretty hard to succeed.  Change will occur when you have a burning desire to live the life you imagine for yourself and fuel it with the belief it CAN be done.  Faith that you can do it will come from within once you have the outcome in mind and belief that it is possible for you.

Visualize success.  Believe it for yourself.  Act on that belief with the end in mind.  Have faith.  This is the formula for creating miracles in your life.  Anything you want to change can be changed the instant you decide to act with a new future in mind.

FEED YOUR ANGEL every day.  Tell yourself why you CAN do things.  Don’t listen to the opinions of anyone trying to keep you down.  Your entire life is thought.  Do you like what you’ve created so far?  Great!  What you see and believe for your future is what you’ll get… spend some time creating the future you desire.

A boy and his mother

We went to the zoo yesterday.  There was a wood fence along one part of the zoo, about two feet high and flat on the top like a balance beam.  A small boy got up to try to walk it and was a bit unsettled and shaky at first, so he called for his mother.  She came over, reached out her hand to him, and the instant they connected everything changed for the boy.  No longer shaky of lacking confidence, he walked the entire length of the fence with no problem.

Some great analogies can be drawn here, such as: when you’re in trouble, uncertain and shaky, ask for help.  Sometimes all you need is to know there are others in your corner to give you the confidence to move forward.

Reach out and touch those around you who need assistance.  The smallest acts of reassurance can make all the difference in the lives of others.  Impacting others in a positive way becomes a habit, but you have to be open to looking for those opportunities.  Once we, as a society, develop the habit of reaching out to others, the world will see a shift in psyche.  Small acts of kindness yield huge rewards over time.

DOWN DAYS

No matter who we are, how much we work on staying positive, all the reading, meditating, journaling and praying we do… there are days we wake up “down”. Why is that? Where does a “down” day come from? We all know people who start every day down because they’ve predetermined that will be how their life and thought patterns will be for themselves. Why do days like that get thrown in to otherwise happy, positive people, though? What can be done about it?

When you have a down day, try not to get caught up in the negative emotion and let it ruin the day. Instead, look for the causes and try to view it as a learning experience. There are days that you won’t be able to find a cause. There are days that will be down because of grief, loss of a loved one, sickness in yourself, friend or family member, etc… and there are those people who suffer from clinical depression. I’m not talking about extended periods of depression here, just the occasional “down” day that happens to almost everyone now & then.

Down days can be an indicator of stress and/or poor health habits in an area of your life. If you’re in the midst of a down day, or stringing a few together, try to take some time and observe your life leading into it. Are you getting enough sleep? Eating properly? Stress at work/home/money or some other area of your life? Down days can lead you to discover things about yourself that will allow you to make changes and set a new course of action for yourself to create a healthier, more fulfilling lifestyle. They can be a catalyst for change… change for the better. You have to look within to find the cause for yourself, then do the work to make the proper corrections in your life.

Using down days for your benefit can be one of the best ways to create a life aligned with your core beliefs and values. When used properly they help us correct course and move ahead in the direction our soul intended for us.

CULTURE OF HAPPINESS

Last month my wife and I had the good fortune of being able to visit the island of Barbados. The country is known for it’s laid back, care free attitude and you feel it the second you get off the plane. If the USA is a 78rpm record, Barbados runs at 33 1/3rpms or less. If you want a relaxing vacation I can’t think of a better place to go.

One of the reasons we loved Barbados so much was the attitude of the inhabitants we met. It seems like the whole country has bought into the idea that they’re living in paradise and it shows in how they treat others. I can’t think of a time we weren’t greeted with a smile and a hello, or how often the question “How are you?” would be answered with something about “living in Barbados, how could you be anything but great?”…

When you spend time around that many happy people who love their lives and have created a culture of happiness that permeates not only their lives and their families, but an entire COUNTRY, it can’t help but have a positive effect on you. We became used to the day to day life in Barbados as a matter of fact.

As soon as we got back to the Miami airport, though… reality hit us that we were back at 78rpms and were going to be treated MUCH different here. We’d smile, say hello to people and get NO response. Customer service was awful compared to what we were used to. We saw many more upset, frowning, frazzled people then we’d seen all week in Barbados.

The funny thing is that if you drove through a typical neighborhood in Barbados you’d probably think they live in squalor by US standards. VERY small houses, not well kept, tightly packed together. Yet THEY are the country that, when dealing with people on a personal level, have the better attitude. THEY are the ones who believe they’re living in paradise.

We are all one step away from living in paradise – the only thing we need to do is realize it and believe it for ourselves. Once you truly believe it, you’ll spread that goodwill to everyone you meet, your co-workers, your family, your community and your country. By feeding your own angel you’ll feed the angel in others by default. I saw it work for an entire country.

I am blessed...

My wife and I were fortunate enough to have the opportunity to spend last week in Barbados. I'll be writing more about the culture of happiness in that country in a blog soon. The day we were leaving we got in the elevator to head to our final lunch on the island, really not wanting at all to have to get on a plane and fly out soon. A staff member was on the elevator and as a greeting I said "How are you"... her answer was: "I am blessed"...

Wow. It hit both of us like a ton of bricks because we were feeling the same thing, what a great life we have, what an awesome opportunity we had to be in Barbados, how blessed we are. Instead of just answering that question with standard "fine", or "doing good"... I am blessed. Aren't we all?

I think it's a great new answer to the age old question "How are you?". Reaffirms to the Universe that you truly are looking at life from an attitude of gratitude for all that you have :)

How are YOU?...

I have no enemies

I have an appointment coming up later in March with someone I see as very negative and I haven't been looking forward to the meeting at all, saw it in my schedule today and started getting all worked up about it again, which to me says "this is a teaching moment, there's something to learn here"...

So I decided to take some time to read, meditate and calm myself, try to see things in a different light.

Go to my daily reading books, open the first one "Living the Wisdom of the Tao" by Wayne Dyer.  As God is my witness, this is the chapter I was on and this is what I read:

"There is no greater misfortune than feeling I have an enemy, for when I have an enemy, there is no room for God"...

69th Verse

There is a saying among soldiers:

I dare not make the first move

but would rather play the guest;

I dare not advance an inch

but would rather withdraw a foot.

This is called

going forward without advancing,

pushing back without using weapons.

There is no greater misfortune

than feeling "I have an enemy";

for when "I" and "enemy" exist together,

there is no room left for my treasure.

Thus, when two opponents meet,

the one without an enemy

will surely triumph.

When armies are evenly matched,

the one with compassion wins.

--

I'll be going into this meeting with a different mindset now.  I think I have an inkling what I needed to learn here.  Thanks once again to two of my favorite spiritual guides, Wayne Dyer & Lao Tzu :)

What would you tell the five year old you?

If you could go back and talk to yourself as a little boy or girl, what would you say? How would you approach it? What are the most important things you would want to let yourself know at that age? Taking some time to put some thought into this RIGHT NOW might be helpful before reading on… Here is how I see my conversation going:

“Little Dave, you are SO special, you’re smart and funny and you can do ANYTHING you put your mind to. Don’t EVER underestimate the power of your own thoughts! It’s what you believed was possible that eventually created who you are today, which is me. We all miss some opportunities, everyone makes mistakes. I’m really happy with the results so far, but since I’ve been given the chance to come back and give you some advice, here goes”:

1 – THOUGHTS CREATE THINGS – Be VERY conscious of what you focus on. SEE yourself succeeding! You will become what you think about, so focus on positive, uplifting thoughts that stir passion within you. Don’t allow other people’s negativity to change any thought or belief you know in your heart is right for you. You can do ANYTHING IN LIFE that you believe, TRULY BELIEVE, for yourself. Belief alone isn’t enough. Once you’ve set a goal, move ahead and let your passion inspire you to do so confidently and in a manner that will be so uplifting to others they will want to help you. You can get anything you want in life if you help enough other people get what THEY want.

EVERYTHING YOU DO from this point forward originates in thought. Get rid of bad, negative thoughts and do not allow negative, cancerous people into your life. Whether you live in light or darkness is your choice. Choose light! Whenever you feel darkness overcome you, look for a light switch – there are times it will be well hidden, but light is ALWAYS available.

2 – DEFEATS ARE STRENGTHS – Defeats are temporary, success is a state of mind. There will be times in life where nothing will seem to be working, where demons will seem to have taken a foothold and darkness falls over your thoughts. These times are the biggest opportunities life has to offer! It is from the darkest of times, our greatest defeats, that we discover our strengths. Always look for the hidden opportunity in every defeat. It’s there; you just have to look for it. Demons try to control your thoughts by handing you defeats in life. They look for weaknesses. But YOU control your reactions, YOU control your thoughts, YOU control your destiny. It’s how you react to setbacks that will show what you’re really feeling internally. Always look for the opportunities in any setback.

3 – BE A FORCE FOR GOOD – In the same way that you always have to be on the lookout for opportunities in any setback and control your own thoughts by focusing on what’s going RIGHT in life, you also need to bring that positive outlook to everything you do. Be a force for GOOD in the world! Help others see the potential in themselves. Change people’s perceptions of what is possible. Just as you can attain whatever you believe is possible for yourself, you can impact any group or organization in life in a similar fashion:

- AT WORK: No matter what the job is, always do your best. If the atmosphere is negative, be a force for the other side. Point out what’s great, look for ways to improve the company and always remember you’re a free agent and can change jobs any time you want to if the circumstances aren’t conducive to a positive mental state. NO job is ever worth doing if you’re just there for the money and dread going in every day. This is one of the most common areas for darkness to sneak into the minds of people. Be aware of this and always look at things from an attitude of doing the best you can and changing things at work for the better.

- FAMILY: Not everyone in your family will be supportive of everything you do. There will be times when other family members are dealing with defeats of their own. Emotional issues with other family members can get heated at times. RELAX… center yourself, and look for ways to change your ENTIRE family’s thought patterns and lives for the better. We first learn to FEED OUR ANGEL and be aware of our personal thought patterns, but families have thought patterns of their own (as do businesses and communities), so align yourself with the angels. Look for what’s going RIGHT, don’t let the naysayers bring you down. Be a leader in your family.

- COMMUNITY: Every community needs leaders. Every community has organizations that help others, where people can volunteer and make a positive impact not only on themselves and their personal families, but the lives of others. A community can be a city, state, country or the world. How many people’s lives would you like to impact? Always look for ways to serve the community. Do what you can to help others align with angels. We can change the world one thought pattern at a time!

“So, little Dave, please take these words to heart. You’re capable of SO many things… really ANYTHING, but you just need to believe it. Setbacks are inevitable, but once you really understand the power of thoughts NOTHING can stop you! And I KNOW because I’m YOU!”…

Unfortunately, none of us can go back and give ourselves advice based on our current levels of knowledge. If we did, we might not be here because the choices we made that brought us here might change because of the impact we had on that awesome little kid that was us so many years ago…

Here’s what we CAN do:

1 – Make sure every child in your life knows these things! You can’t tell yourself, but there are millions of children who need to know what you wish you knew. We can ABSOLUTELY change the world one child at a time! “Be a force for good” in the lives of every child you meet!

2 – You can’t go back and talk to yourself as a child, but… what would the future you tell yourself if he or she visited today? Probably the same types of things! We are ALL capable of SO MUCH MORE than we realize! Find ways to spread LOVE to the world! Learn to love yourself, to FEED YOUR ANGEL every day, then take that love, take that positive, can-do “I can’t be defeated” attitude into EVERYTHING YOU DO! Have a conversation with your future self, they’ll tell you. No matter where life finds you today, you can and must leave a legacy of love. FEED THE ANGELS OF THE WORLD. As we all focus on what’s right, the world will change with us.

YOU CAN DO THIS.
WE ALL CAN!